I’ve been doing martial arts for a long time, and I’ve had to come out as queer in a variety of spaces. I don’t consider myself transgender in the manner you think when you hear the word. I’m nonbinary. My gender expression is fluid, because of this I am afforded more respect and restraint by others than is given to my transgender friends.
Even with this, I have experienced my share of violence in the martial arts world. I have been threatened with property damage, sexual assault, and death all for being a little fruity. And given my unique vantage point, I can tell you that trans folks have it pretty poorly in the martial arts world. Even with safe schools and organizations, that doesn’t mean it’s an easy road to walk.
Transgender people are wonderful. How amazing is it that someone loves manhood/womanhood so much that they risk state-sanctioned violence? Some people would say it’s courageous. Others say, don’t think of it as courage, think of it as purely necessary. Either way I have only met a few transgender people I didn’t like, and I’ve met a lot.
Not only do I train multiple martial arts, but I have lived a life that encourages and sometimes requires travel. Work, education, and family have moved me around the United States. Training and competition have taken me to different states and even across the Atlantic. And going into the future, I have no plans to stop traveling. This has given me a very broad and diverse view of martial arts and how LGBTQ+ people engage with it.
I have condensed my experience into a few basic ideas.
Trans people face five times more violence than their cisgender counterparts.1
I would argue that trans folks are in greater need of self defense and martial arts because of this. But you’re not always going to find them in these spaces. Martial arts gyms often have big loud people who look and sound like the kind of folks who enact violence against transgender folks. So it can be difficult for trans and nonbinary people to feel safe enough to join a gym.
And you might say, “Don’t judge a book by its cover.” But if a trans woman or some “blue haired liberal” walked into your gym, would you really give them the benefit of the doubt? Because if they’ve walked in and tried a class, they’ve given you that benefit. They’ve taken that first step, can we take a step towards them?
Trans people often have to defend their existence. Don’t make it a debate.
This means that they are very tired of having the same conversations. So they probably don’t want to ‘debate’ you about some aspect of trans identity. They may be comfortable answering some questions, but you shouldn’t feel entitled to their time in this regard. If you are looking for good resources on the topic, ask them, or shoot me a message. Chances are, if you’re reading this, you follow me on one platform or another. So don’t be afraid to reach out. But don’t assume that everyone can expertly explain everything. I mean, how many karateka actually know the history of their art, or how many jiujitsu players know the full story of BJJ’s development?
On top of this, many of us see our kwoons/dojo/gyms as places of respite. While we may seek discomfort in the form of training, this discomfort exists for our self improvement. We’re not there to deal with the politics of our society. We’re there to learn. And this is true for most people, not just trans and queer people.
So make the choice to create a welcoming atmosphere where everyone can be as they are. Allow people to come to you as individuals, see them as such, treat them as such.
Trans people can not always utilize the full extent of violence that a martial art might advocate. So be prepared to discuss this issue.
This isn’t to say that they shouldn’t learn these arts. All people who look for self defense should know how to respond in stand, clinch, ground, and weapons scenarios. But trans people, like other queer folks, will often be perceived differently when legal forces are involved. So what might be treated as a cut-and-dry self defense case for a cis woman may not be the case for a trans woman. Currently only 20 states and the District of Columbia have outlawed the “LGBTQ+ panic” defense. This is a legal argument that attempts to reduce the assailant’s criminal liability by pointing to the victim’s gender and sexual orientation as a reason to panic or fear for their safety. It’s not a wash in and of itself, but it is used as part of a broader argument in the defendant’s case. So even if you do protect yourself and the assailant is brought up on charges, there may be no justice given.
On top of this, consider how nerve wracking it can be to deal with the police as a cisgendered person. Now consider that this person who has an enormous amount of power over you, qualified immunity, and the ability to make you disappear, may utterly hate you. And there’s nothing you can do in that moment to make them stop hating you. Some of you reading this may know the feeling already due to race, ethnicity, or religious backgrounds.
So trans people often have to find more ways to de-escalate, defend themselves using ‘soft’ techniques, or engage in bystander intervention. The Traction Project has a solid self defense curriculum built around these ideas. They are a great resource for anyone looking at LGBTQ+ oriented self defense training. And what they teach can even be integrated into what you already teach.
If you mess up, it’s okay. Just try again.
Just like in the practice of martial arts, we will mess up sometimes. We may accidentally misgender someone, or we may just speak ignorantly on a topic we know very little about. This might upset someone, but what’s important is to simply apologize and try again. And when I say ‘try,’ I do mean you have to make an effort to do better.
Don’t seek forgiveness, give an apology. I’m setting those up as separate things for a reason. Sometimes we ask for forgiveness, but we push the other person to forgive. It can lead to tension and doesn’t always help. Instead just give your apology for however you messed up and say what you’ll do better. Of course, you don’t have to only use this method of apology with trans folks. It’s a pretty solid strategy in general.
If someone in the gym is using transphobic language, nip it in the bud.
You don’t have to be angry or forceful about correcting language. However when someone is using language that makes others feel unsafe, you should show leadership and ask them not to continue that behavior. As an instructor you have power in your school to make change and can do so gently. This also applies to advanced students or even just students who have the right blend of patience and grit.
Martial arts teach us to deal with discomfort and frustration. But we don’t need to add undue stress when the rest of the world is so stressful. I know many instructors who don’t like politics to be discussed in their gym because it can be such a quagmire. And I understand their reasoning. Following that train of thought, that’s why we should be prepared to expect our students to treat each other with respect and kindness. Life in society is inherently political, so politics will follow us. But that doesn’t mean we have to abide by the black and white norms of government politics. You create the culture in your gym, along with your students.
And this doesn’t mean you can’t have humor involving queer folks in your gym. But is it about laughing with us, or at us? Trans folks usually have great senses of humor, very dark, very dry. But the earlier they are in their journey, the more vulnerable life can feel. So try and empathize. Trans people are not out here policing your language like some sort of corporate Democrat speech writer. If they ask you not to say something, it’s probably for a good reason. Be willing to not know all the answers, and listen to the people who trust in you enough to speak with you.
Transgender people in competitions are not the issue we make it out to be.
There are very few transgender people in our society. As far as we can tell, transgender folks make up one to two percent of the population.2 In 2024, there were roughly 7 million active martial arts practitioners in the US population.3 That’s about 2.14% percent of our population, using a conservative 326.7 million as our metric. But this could be a smaller percentage, as the Census estimated 340 million as of 2024. Obviously there is some overlap in the transgender community and the martial arts community, but it’s not a circle. Personally, I have had the great fortune of meeting many LGBTQ+ martial artists through open mats, seminars, and camps. I’ve even learned from transgender black belts in Brazilian Jiu-jitsu.
Some of the trans practitioners I know want to compete in their art, some don’t. And I do think they have the right to compete against other fighters. And I’m not going to get into the science of transitioning and athletic performance. There are plenty of articles on that.
What I know is that combat is one of the freest forms of expression in the world. No fight or match is the same and every time you get in there you are the only person who can be blamed for your performance. And competition teaches you in ways that light sparring and technique practice can’t. So yes, there are trans people in jiujitsu and Muay Thai and boxing and all these other sports. Fencing has competitions with male and female categories, but many meets are coed and women routinely beat men. So there’s no reason to stop a trans person from competing in a gender category in such a sport. And yet there have been fencers unwilling to compete against trans women, despite regularly competing against cis men in co-ed meets. So we can see this issue has reared its head even in martial arts with a practice of co-ed competition. This, of course, is a more difficult question in martial arts where competition is strictly separated by gender.
Everyone who is attempting to better themself through martial arts has a right to compete fairly. So what options are there?
- Hold competitions with gender absolute divisions.
- Hold competitions that specify they are trans inclusive.
- Some better third option I haven’t thought of.
The gender absolute division could be handled by weight divisions. So whether you are cisgender or transgender, you’ll be competing with people different from you, but still at least in the same weight class.
Gender-inclusive competitions would just be normal comps. Competitors just know when signing up that there might be a transgender person in their division. If you don’t like it, there’s plenty of other competitions to go to.
So as a coach or instructor, if you’ve got a trans student who wants to compete, look for competitions that accommodate them or even look for LGBTQ+ competitions like the Sin City Classic and Wrestling Without Borders. It may feel weird to go to queer specific events, but sometimes those are the only options available. And on top of this, you’re giving money directly to the community.
Obviously, I want trans people to be able to compete at the highest levels of whatever their passion is. And in some martial arts, that is already possible. However, in others this is not yet the case. So we have to find the best options available. And if you have the time and resources, maybe you can help make more opportunities for everyone.
The people making the biggest fuss about trans people are usually not doing so altruistically.
Plenty of people might have concerns about transgender folks because they don’t have experience with them. But the folks in the martial arts community who are railing against trans people are rarely paragons of virtue. We’re talking about sexual predators, misogynists, and scammers. This might sound like ad hominem, but it is a real concern. BJJ competitors like Gordon Ryan talk about the unfairness of trans jiujiteiras, but is himself hopped up on steroids and a sexual predator. Jake Shields has made a huge issue of LGBTQ+ people, and he aligns himself with neonazis. These are not people who have our best interests at heart. They are making a cultural scarecrow, a bogeyman, to keep people focused on. When people are scared of something in the distance, they don’t notice the man stealing their wallet. So whenever you hear someone fearmongering or dehumanizing transgender people, ask yourself what their motivation is.
Most trans people just want to do martial arts because they’re cool. Self defense is important, and many will have that as a focus. But a lot of people just want to wrestle or do sweet flip kicks or swing swords around. So if you’re cool with trans martial artists, just try and be supportive to the ones you meet. You don’t need to be their best friend or some white knight come to save the day.
This also means you shouldn’t take any guff from people who want to talk shit and put down others. If you wouldn’t tolerate homophobia, you shouldn’t tolerate transphobia either. Just treat them as they are, people who love something you love, and help them grow in that passion.
- https://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/publications/anti-lgbt-victimization-us/ ↩︎
- ttps://www.politifact.com/article/2023/jul/13/how-many-trans-people-are-there-in-the-us ↩︎
- https://www.statista.com/statistics/191917/participants-in-martial-arts-in-the-us-since-2006/ ↩︎